Quiet Your Mind

 I have been hearing of and reading about many who are struggling to write and create in light of all we face in the current state of the world these days.

Initially, I was doing well carving out more time to write and even completing new rough drafts, albeit "shi**y" first drafts. And then it was like...poof! My mind started spiraling and sputtering. I still wrote in fits and spurts but never felt very creative or productive. 

Recently, I've been making headway again and working more with a better mental frame of mind. This morning, I sat to read a chapter and opened my book to this...

"Shut Off the Information."

 

In SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD:  60 SUGGESTIONS FOR GETTING UNSTUCK, Vinita Hampton Wright says, "You receive more information in a day than your great-grandmother received in a month...if you watch television news, listen to the radio, read newspapers and magazines, and surf the internet, then you are constantly absorbing much more information than you have the ability to deal with."

Wow! What a catch-22 this is. As writers, we often look to places like newspapers to get story ideas. We need the internet for creating our platform and marketing ourselves and our work. But, the flip side, in today's world especially, is the overwhelming sense of concern, fear and frustration with many happenings, and this can be stifling.

Wright suggests we, "Take a break from information," because, "After a point it is no longer information, but merely more noise in your head." So. Very. True!

Ultimately, it goes back to the ever elusive balance in writing as well as in life. Manage your time; manage your balance and give yourself some grace.

"Your mind and soul need breathing space. They can't always be solving problems or forming opinions."

Seems terrific advice in this over-stimulated, always on the go, ever more chaotic world in which we live.

Daydream Believer

The word "create" is defined by Webster's Collegiate Dictionary as, "to bring into existence...to produce or bring about by a course of action or behavior...to produce through imaginative skill."

I've been thinking of this word a lot recently in my efforts to be more productive with, and conscientious of, my time. It seems, however, more often than not, I find my brain here...

Between the COVID-19 Pandemic and the state of the world right now, my brain seems to be continually whirring while bouncing around various daydreams wreaking havoc on consistent productivity. At least, I felt that way until I read the following.

In another chapter of SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD (appropriately titled Daydream), Vinita Hampton Wright says, "Daydreams are little exercises, that's all." I love this! What a wonderful concept to be able to feel I am "working" while daydreaming. Clearly this is a productive thought process as a writer; however, I typically think of daydreaming more as "pre-work" than "work," per se. While my rationale mind knows this daydreaming is a necessary part of the writing process, I often feel like I am wasting time when sitting somewhere staring off into never-never land.

Wright goes on to say, "Give in to your mind's tendency to escape. It wants to escape for a reason. You're piling up too much pressure somewhere. Or maybe you're simply tired."

I am going to interpret this to mean I need to embrace my daydreaming self and cultivate my imagination in hopes of creating something from the myriad of ideas floating about my brain. Lord knows there has been enough pressure and tiredness for everyone these last few months. It is ongoing and will be so for some time to come. Give yourself a little escape and join me in the clouds for a bit.

Wishing you all continued health and beautiful daydreams.

Be Okay With Relinquishing Control

Relinquishing control. I've been accused of not being able to do so very well. Is it more about feeling I have to do X, Y and Z or is it more about relinquishing control and being okay with something not being done "my way?" It is debatable.

This has been a life long struggle but particularly so during this period of the COVID-19 Pandemic with a jam-packed house full of people working and schooling from home without a functional basement. One of the positive things to come of this period of necessary quiet and being home-bound (and while there are a great many negatives, there are also some positives of quarantining with family) is the need to just be okay with letting some things go--the importance of which then diminishes greatly and guess what? It is okay!

It is okay to relinquish control and let a child help clean the house; it is okay to let the kids help make dinner (if they are old enough, of course). It is okay to not complete all the items on your TTD list for the day--or any of them at all, for that matter.

Life happenings right now have served to alter the definition of what is important in the world and, in turn, what is not as important despite what we thought previously. This can be applied to one's writing life, work life or overall way of life in general.

While relinquishing control (as much in what I feel I need to accomplish in any given day as much as my perception of how I think something should be completed by others, i.e. my kids or husband) is very difficult for me. I am learning and giving new meaning to the phrases, "such is life" and "this too shall pass." And you know what, I am more at peace on a day-to-day basis.

And then today, I read a chapter in SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD for the first time in a long while, and it was the perfect chapter to give voice to all I've been feeling. The title of the chapter was Choose Not to Care.  In it, Wright said, "Sometimes you have to give yourself permission to just not care so much about how something will turn out."

Clearly one has to care about many things in life, at least to some degree, and I am not suggesting otherwise; however, I do agree that, "If you care deeply about everything, you'll never be able to rest."

How many of us push and push to complete just one more task, finish just one more chapter, do just one more thing, etc. But will it really matter tomorrow? Some, yes. And that is what one must do. But, the nos...let them go. Spend those moments with your spouse or kids, reading a book or watching a movie, or just sitting quietly enjoying the calm and quiet for a few minutes. Take in the scenery, the sights, the sounds and smells and get back to appreciating life and all it entails, the good and the not so great. Be thankful and find the joy, even in the little things for, sometimes, the little things are all we can find.

Wright goes on to say, "The truth is, it's up to you to prioritize all the jobs and tasks in your life. You can decide what is most important, what is next in importance, what you can take or leave, and what has nothing to do with you."

The words that really are important here are, "it's up to you." It is, isn't it? Or it certainly should be. Decide what is important to you and for you and let the rest go. The world won't stop turning, the day won't end. It. Will. Be. Okay! Take care of yourself or you won't be able to be there for your family, friends, work or whomever and whatever your life holds that is important to you.

Take care and be well!

Find a Breath of Fresh Air

"If I take the moments to walk, will you bring me a breath of fresh air? If I move to a new space for a while, will you make it interesting and help my mind break out of its patterns? If I take time to look at clouds or flowers, will you fill my creative self with a new idea or two?"

The above comes from a little prayer at the end of a chapter in the book, SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD:  60 SUGGESTIONS FOR GETTING UNSTUCK.

I've posted about this wonderful book in the past and continue to find it so helpful. I had been struggling with stagnant writing, lack of time throughout the holidays and just an overwhelming feeling of inadequacy as 2019 wrapped up. I know I'm not alone in this feeling, but it can still be a very "alone" mentality at times.

As 2020 dawned, StoryStorm brought new ideas and inspiration (thank you, Tara Lazar). With the start of March came Reading for Research Month, known as ReFoReMo (thank you, Carrie Charley Brown and Kirsti Call). Both have re-lit the fire within me and helped get me back on track with my writing and creativity. Today, I read more of this book and came across the chapter and prayer quoted above, and it just reiterated the importance of taking moments of self healing and care which will, in turn, create and open my mind and ability to put life in perspective which, in turn, creates a calmness and sense of relaxation that helps spur my ability to write and create. And it has helped considerably. Much needed!

What works for you? I would love to hear how you fuel the fires of creativity, especially in those trying and busy times of life.

Build Your Best Self

"Fear and dread are great cripplers of the spirit."

So says Vinita Hampton Wright in SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD: 60 SUGGESTIONS FOR GETTING UNSTUCK.

As I have continued to explore and be enlightened by this book, I've grown to see how "stuck" one can become in all facets of life. Stuck in writing, yes, but also stuck in mindset (hence why my next book exploration will be MINDSET: THE NEW PSYCHOLOGY OF SUCCESS by Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D.), stuck in routine (I am guilty as charged), stuck in thought or belief (positive or negative) and so forth. So how then does one become "unstuck" in order to move forward?

I am a firm believer in the power of positive thinking and am often arguing the merit of the proverbial glass half full, not empty, to those naysayers out there. Clearly, I don't live wearing rose-colored glasses but do believe one can set the tone and mindset for the day by choosing to focus on and see the positive rather than assuming the worst.

The prayer at the end of one of the chapter reads...

"How much more positive my life would be if I just assumed that things will go well. Give me that kind of vision."

Oh boy, yes! In fact, this has been an ongoing discussion in my household as of late for various reasons. I have lectured some on not assuming something will happen a certain and expected way but to, rather, wait and let things unfold before jumping to conclusions. This has stemmed from a negative place of assumption however. Perhaps I should now lecture the benefits of assuming from a place of positivity...rather than expecting it to be another crappy, cloudy day, see the sun peeking from behind the cool cloud; rather than expecting to fail a test, assume you will know more than you think given the effort put forth in studying; rather than expecting another rejection, assume the editor or agent may love your manuscript and, if not, surely another will...see my point?

Much of this negativity, it seems to (and for) me, stems from a place of fear. Fear of being ridiculed, fear of losing or not being good enough, fear of failure...even fear of success depending on what that success entails. Fear can drive, or stunt, so many of our thoughts, beliefs and abilities. We must overcome this fear.

Wright says, "So put away fear today. And build upon hope...when you finally face the thing you fear or dread, it automatically becomes a smaller monster."

And, I would argue, frees the ties that bind our minds.  Step by step, task by task, hour by hour, day by day...the piles get tackled, the projects get accomplished and the mind and negativity get quieted.

Let's build our best selves and not be crippled by anything negative!

Given I have often posted about this book, I'm sure you can guess I highly recommend it. I have enjoyed it immensely and found it very beneficial thus far. I bet you would too!

A Failure is Not the End

It has been some time since I've picked up my copy of SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD, but I read several chapters last night and was reminded why I enjoyed it so much previously.  I highly recommend this book by Vinita Hampton Wright regardless of which part of your life you may need some suggestions for getting unstuck.

In the section entitled Acts of Daring, Wright quotes Gregg Levoy in CALLINGS as saying,

"I was once told that if I am not failing regularly, I'm living so far below my potential that I'm failing anyway."

This really spoke to me. I suppose it seems a bit harsh to consider the possibility that one is failing if not "failing," but I think the idea involves taking some risks in life. If one doesn't try, and inevitably fail some, one cannot achieve his/her potential as it is only in putting oneself out there and being vulnerable, and sometimes failing miserably, that one can reach greatness.

I recall often hearing my mom say, "If at first you don't succeed, try and try again." It wasn't, "If at first you don't succeed, give up."

Much in our lives, both personally and professionally, is learned the hard way with great effort and a whole lot of blood, sweat and tears, so why should writing be any different?

Whether in the comments received from critique partners or the rejections received from agents or publishers (even those nice champagne rejections), authors must have a thick skin and press on.  Perhaps we need to adjust how we perceive those "failures" and consider them fuel for the proverbial fire within rather than a reason to give up on something. I am a firm believer in persistence pays and perseverance is as, if not more, important than anything else. It has certainly been the case for me anyway in many aspects of my life.

So, my friends, if at first you don't succeed, continue to work hard and press on regardless of the struggles encountered. I will be doing the same. For any road worth traveling has a few bumps along the way.

Comfort Zone

Lists are my comfort zone.  Sometimes I make lists within my lists.  Often actually.  In the days before I discovered planners, my brother-in-law picked on me for the weekly lists I made on yellow legal pads like the image above.  I kept myself very organized this way.  I am a pencil and paper person by nature, so I prefer planners to online tools. If any of you have a suggestion for a planner that works well for writers, I would love to hear it. But back to my point...

Have you ever had so much to do that you get overwhelmed and simply do nothing at all? Or nothing of importance on your TTD list anyway?

I'm finally getting further in reading Vinita Hampton Wright's SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD (so I am getting some things completed!). The beginning lines of the first chapter stopped me. They fit me to a T! Wright says, "There's so much to do that I don't know where to start. I think of everything I'm responsible for and everything I'd like to accomplish, and I panic--and sometimes I cope by doing nothing at all."

Bam, yep, that is me. In a nutshell. And it isn't just writing or writing-related tasks but more just the combination of all...life happenings, work responsibilities, things I NEED to get finished and things I WANT to do. I try to keep my lists manageable and reasonable whether it is daily lists, weekly lists or just the overall collage of things hanging over my head that need to get finished soon.  And. I. Love. Lists! I love to make them. I love to cross items off my lists and see the end in sight and the re-shaping of the upcoming week's target goals. I can feel accomplished as I see this shift in my TTD list. As Wright says, "Lists are good for dreaming, for prioritizing, for helping the mind make order out of a situation that has become overwhelming."

My list is a way to navigate my time to be most efficient, and I find I am getting better at keeping it useful to stay on track and keep order in my day. And on the worst of days, lists do help, as Wright says, "regain some control over a mind gone berserk with clutter and worry." Berserk certainly seems like the perfect word somedays:)

Do you use handwritten lists? Online tools? None or all of the above? I am always interested in the best ways to stay organized should you feel inclined to share what works for you.

   

Step By Step

While traveling for vacation, I finally had some time to start reading SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD by Vinita Hampton Wright which I've posted about previously. The premise of this book is all about taking steps in the right direction. As Wright says, "One simple act is a step in the right direction."

I know for myself I often get overwhelmed with the totality of all and, therefore, lose sight of the single, small steps I could take in the right direction. Once overwhelmed, it is easy to let it build until such time as it becomes more tolerable to do the distasteful--clean a toilet, pull weeds, etc.--than starting to dig out of the rut. And here enters the "stuck" mind which impacts the creative process as a whole. BIG PROBLEM!

Per Madeleine L'Engle, "Creativity opens us to revelation, and when our high creativity is lowered...so is our capacity to see angels, to walk on water, to talk to unicorns." And, as we all know, this is a must as writers when creating worlds where readers can and want to live.

In the intro of her book, Wright says, "The only way to get unstuck is to take a step. It can be a big or little step, and you usually have a choice of directions. But it's an action with purpose behind it, and no one else can do it for you."

So, step by step, one step at a time, I will work on this mission to unstick myself--my mind--and re-claim my creativity. When I stumble and backtrack, I will press on rather than letting my stumble become a fall. More to come...

If you have words of wisdom on the most productive steps that work for you, please do feel free to share!

Stuck

Have you ever felt like the social media part of your writing life is similar to your household when one thing goes wrong and spirals into numerous issues? Broken door knob, crooked cupboard door, leaky faucet, broken pool cover, a toilet running whenever it so chooses, etc.

Similarly, in the writing side of life, email trouble, social media icons showing up as ? symbols, updates needed on blogs and websites, outdated copyright year dates, computer issues, etc.

Sometimes the overwhelming feeling of both leaves me feeling stuck. Stuck doing household duties when I'd rather spend time with family or reading. Stuck doing marketing updates and items when I'd rather be writing something new or editing a current WIP.

Hence, I just ordered a book I recently saw suggested--SIMPLE ACTS OF MOVING FORWARD: 60 SUGGESTIONS FOR GETTING UNSTUCK by Vinita Hampton Wright.

You can find it here https://www.amazon.com/Simple-Acts-Moving-Forward

It just arrived, and I can't wait to start reading and learning.  Stay tuned...